Freespace - The fine art of motivation

RECENTLY, while stretching after a fitness session, the way I used to look four years ago became the topic of conversation. "Wah! I tell you, Daniel, that time you were really hot! I mean, really really you looked so good! You were so slim and lean!" one person said. The silence that followed was uncomfortable.
This time, I curiously felt humiliated. Admittedly, this person had said the same thing previously. No one had told her how she herself is battling weight issues, but when one is at centre stage and someone else points out one's flaws, it is a humbling experience.
And I realised that I was experiencing body shaming, something I had not experienced since I was a teenager, when I was always referred to as the "fat friend". While doing the rest of the warm down, I felt hurt and angry. Later, after some reflection I decided to write about it.
In 2011, there was talk about an anti-obesity law to be mooted in Parliament. The move was meant to curb the spread of non-communicable diseases, such as heart diseases and diabetes, in the country.
At the time, I recall I was unsure if such a move was a good idea. Part of me thought that it would be awesome if the country got healthier, and if possible, slimmer too. And yet, the other part of me realised that such a legislation might be counter productive.
The piece of legislation was believed to be modelled after Japan's anti-obesity law, which provided for measuring the waistlines of employees as part of their annual medical check-up. An employer would face penalties if its workers' waistlines exceed 33.5 inches for men and 35.4 inches for women.
What if that piece of legislation was in effect now and I were an employee? What if I failed to get my waist below the prescribed measurement? Would I feel as humiliated and as frustrated as I did when I was shamed in front of all my other clients?
The answer would be a resounding yes. I have worked hard to get to where I am now. Once upon a time, I used to be severely overweight. The insides of my jeans and trousers used to wear out because my thighs used to rub against each other. I practically could not see my toes.
One day, I got so tired of all that and started exercising in the bedroom for half an hour at night. I was careful to reduce my high GI (glycemic index) carbs and to increase my healthy protein and fat portions. Within six months, I had lost 28kg and was proud of myself.
There was no turning back. It came to a point that I was uncompromising with my exercise routines to my detriment. Now, many injuries later, I have learnt a softer approach is wiser. Rest days? Yes! Junk food? Sometimes! Exercise, almost every day. It has to be fun yet loving.
The thing is, we grow older. Our body's metabolism is not the same as it was when we were young. If my trousers got tight previously, all I had to do was swim diligently for a week and the trousers would be loose again. Now, that doesn't happen.
But most people in the fitness industry are pretty big on the shaming method of motivation. I heard that some yoga classes in Singapore have the instructor yelling, "Come on, Singapore, you're fat!" as a way to motivate the class to move. I mean, really?
So I am glad the anti-obesity law did not happen. Shaming someone about the shape of their body is not the best way to motivate them to change. Aren't there better and more loving ways we can treat others and ourselves?
Daniel freelances in writing and fitness training, and has a deep passion for health, fitness, sleep and travel. Comments: letters@thesundaily.com