PETALING JAYA: Not many men openly speak up for women’s rights nor promote themselves as feminists.
However, according to two male self-confessed feminists, feminism is not the sole purview of women. As one of them pointed out, it is about believing that women deserve the same opportunities as men.
In conjunction with World Men’s Day today, theSun talked to All Women’s Action Society service programme officer Eugene How and Women’s Aid Organisation (WAO) deputy executive officer Yu Ren Chung to get their views on advocating women’s rights.
“It is not about women being better than men,” said How, adding that many confuse feminism as replacing patriarchy with matriarchy.
“That’s not true. As feminists, we are not advocating fewer rights for men. We want more rights for everyone.”
How said feminism has taught him that being a man does not mean he has to be uncaring and unemotional, the traditionally accepted traits to prove masculinity.
“It has taught me that toxic masculinity should have no place in modern society,” he said.
In fact, he added, men are hurt by the fact that they are not allowed to experience anything considered feminine without being seen as weak.
“As a result, they project the only emotion they are allowed to, which is anger. Unfortunately, women are at the receiving end most of the time.”
How said feminism could teach one to be respectful regardless of gender.
“A man is not automatically deserving of respect, nor is a woman automatically considered less capable than men. I think people should realise that one is capable (of something) not because of gender but because of hard work and passion,” he said.
How believes that the traditional perception of masculinity is no longer relevant.
“We no longer frown upon men who pick up traditional female traits and it has become acceptable for women to be career-minded, loud, brash and boisterous – traits traditionally associated with being masculine,” he said.
However, he conceded that male feminists still benefit from the power imbalance that has always been in favour of men.
“The good thing is that male feminists can utilise this power imbalance to positively influence and support feminism,” he said.
How advised parents to unlearn everything they were taught in a patriarchy environment to help future generations of male children to better understand the benefits of feminism.
“Tell your sons it’s okay to cry, to like ‘girly’ things. Don’t punish them for behaving in ways that are not within the bounds of traditional masculinity,” he added.
How said parents should also hold their sons accountable for their actions and errors.
“Don’t hold them to a standard different from your daughters.”
Yu believes that men have a responsibility to also be feminists.
“In many ways being male has its benefits, more because of social bias than merit. This is unfair. We ought to support gender equality,” he said.
He added that men are also sometimes well placed to address gender inequality.
Yu cited a study by WAO, which revealed that men tend to deny that gender inequality is a problem and mistrust women’s reports of violence.
“As a result, many men do not see the need for feminism.”
Yu stressed that gender equality would uplift everyone.
“Equal opportunity will enable women to have greater participation in economy, family and public life, and raising productivity for everyone’s benefit.
Greater diversity in decision-making will also lead to better outcome overall.”
